How I Met Katy Perry

I hung out with Katheryn once.  I met her around the time when the song, I Kissed a Girl was popular.  I think that was 2008?  She was with two of my friends upstairs of Beso, Eva Longoria’s restaurant.  I think the club portion of the restaurant is called Kiss, or that’s what everyone referenced … Read more

What It’s like to Be a Gold Digger

When I tell girls about my lifestyle, they think that I’m a gold digger. My best friend, the one who disappeared, she swears I’m the biggest gold digger in the world. Maybe I’m qualified to answer what it’s like to be a gold digger. I don’t know. I have a ton of rich friends.  Mostly male. They like to … Read more

How I Met Bill Clinton

I met William J. Clinton once.  It was quite an honor, actually.  Back in 2004, he decided to do a book signing at Eso Won Books in Los Angeles. I was working at Macy’s at the time, you know…  Selling women’s shoes and stuff.  Being 19 and selling women’s shoes wasn’t really a bad gig.  … Read more

Fakes and Flakes and Why They’re Grrreat! Making Deals in the Frosty Heart of LA

Once upon a time in the past, I had put up a job ad on Craigslist to hire a personal assistant. It was the heart of the recession and as each minute passed by, I had a new applicant. It was like clockwork. 1 minute. 1 new application. It went on that way for 400 … Read more