My life long goal was to get my ex back. We met in 2003. It was love at first sight. We were in a relationship in 2005. Then parted ways in 2006. I spent the rest of my life trying to figure out how to get her back.
I almost had her.
Then, one day in 2012, when I was out with her, she pushed me away. I was so hurt by her actions that I left. I tried to hop a fence to my home while drunk and became seriously injured. I broke two bones in my ankle.
I was out in a cast for three months. She never came to visit me once during my injury.
I came to realize, I had spent at least six years of my life, being depressed, lost, and dependent on her. I couldn’t do anything with all my heart, because in the back of my mind, all I wanted was her. However, my injury showed me who my true friends were and who didn’t care about me at all.
Then, I realized, I had been wasting my life away. Trying to be with someone who didn’t even love me. It was time to give up.
So, I finally let her go.
I stopped living for her.
Did I regret giving up my goal? Quite frankly, it was the most liberating experience of my life.
I compiled all the data from the experiences of my life and learned the lessons that I never had time to process. In the process, I remembered my grandfather and how he raised me. A memory I buried deep, underneath layers of my subconscious mind.
I began to understand that I was designed to live in his image. I shed myself of my worldly needs and decided to live a life of love, a life of abundance, a life of inspiration.
My purpose here is no longer to be chasing people I can never have, who are unable to share mutual feelings of love. However, it is to do what my grandfather did when he was alive. I am here to spread my love, my experience, and my abundance, to inspire others to live their dreams.
No longer will I ever live a life to impress. No longer will I work for applause. No longer will I strive to make my presence noticed. Instead, I am here to live my life to express. I am here to work for a cause.
Maybe, one day, when I come to depart from this world, my absence will be felt.
Originally posted on Quora.
Leonard Kim is Managing Partner at InfluenceTree. At InfluenceTree, Leonard and his team teach you how to build your (personal or business) brand, get featured in publications and growth hack your social media following.
0 thoughts on “When I Had to Give Up on My Only Goal”
This BROKE my heart. I am feeling that intensely about my ex at the moment…on and off for about 8 years…and now its truly truly over…and I still miss him with all of me….a punch to the heart is what it feels like. The absolute knowledge that he wants to live life without me in it. That I do NOT complete him. He never could love me the way that I loved him. I wasted all these years….and this just happened three days ago. I can’t help wishing….
It’s so hard to overcome something like this… I spent years in a whirlpool of hell within my own mind trying to figure things out, only to get nowhere.