Someone on Quora asked:
I’m 17. I used to have everything. My parents lost it all. Now I’m depressed and I find it hard to leave my bed everyday because I have anxiety attacks in bathrooms. What should I do?
This was my response:
Most people, when they get older and make major decisions with what to do with their lives, they don’t realize that it’s derived from some event from their past. Some shocking, tragic thing that left them in situations such as yourself.
Seriously though, if I went to ask people who told me they wanted to get rich why they wanted to do that, they’d probably give me a few bs answers, then after asking why a few more times, they come to realize that it’s a moment like the one you’re encountering now that shaped those decisions.
Don’t get me wrong. Having everything you want and being successful is great. Not having to worry about anything is great. I’d sign up for that life program in a heartbeat. But much like how you’re dealing with hell right now, I’ve been there too.
You won’t see it today. You won’t see it tomorrow. But much later, you will see this moment when you felt so defeated as just a distant memory. Something you can laugh about when you look back upon it.
In the meantime, the first thing you need to do is accept your circumstances. You don’t want it to be a part of you because of how others treat you in school. You want to deny yourself of your position because of how painful it is.
Accept the circumstances. Embrace the pain. Learn to be strong while going through this. Your hardest times will bring you to become wiser and much smarter when making decisions in the future. Your tolerance for risk and the probabilities of what could occur will become sharper.
Next, look towards the future. What do you want to be when you grow up? What do you want to have? What do you want to avoid?
Figure out a basic road map to get there (e.g. get in college, graduate, apply to xyz job or whatever it is you want to do.)
Then once you’ve finished that, get out a piece of paper and go back to where you are today.
On the left side, write:
Who are you?
You’re scared. You’re depressed. You’re at the lowest peak in your life. Plus whatever other feelings you may have.
Then think of the type of person who has that dream job or business or whatever it may be.
On the right side, write:
Who are they?
They’re confident. They’re well mannered. They’re calm under pressure.
Basically, put all those traits together and draw out the outline for the person who holds whatever goal you wish to attain. Make as many points as possible.
This will help you assess your weaknesses. Plus show you what you need to improve upon. Then start working on making those weaknesses turn into strengths.
You probably read something I wrote. So keep doing that. Continue to read. Continue to learn. Continue to reach out to others. Continue to seek out ways to become better. Then practice and become better. This is something you’ll continue to do for the rest of your life.
After you’ve improved a tad bit, start to take action. Do things that will help you progress from where you are today to where you want to be in the future. Then when you’re there, or when you’re on your way there and in a better situation than you are now, give back to others the wisdom you have gathered throughout the days, months, or years of your life.
You can reacquire everything you have once lost. But there’s no point to have it all without the satisfaction of earning it all with your own two hands. So go out there and move forward with your life.
If you need any advice or direction, feel free to ask. But remember, broke is only temporary. Poor is eternal. So by accepting that you’re broke, you can equip yourself with a game plan to one day turn it all back around.
Originally posted on Quora.